Integrity is deciding to integrate my
heart’s values into my daily actions.
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Integrity comes from the word
"integrate." The feeling that
you get when you know what you're doing is right, that's integrity. The key word is "deciding". You don't slip into integrity. Nobody ever said, "Oops, I fell into
integrity." It's something you have
to decide on in life.
It's important in THAT God placed a very high value on
integrity. Proverbs 28:6 "Better
is the poor who walks in his integrity, than he who is crooked though he be
rich." God says integrity is a
lot more valuable than all the stuff I think is valuable.
However, the problem many of
us have with integrity is what is called the "the frustration
gap". That is the gap between my
heart's values and my daily actions. When
they don’t match it causes us a frustration in our lives.
We are not alone in this
struggle for the Apostle Paul points out about his own life in Romans
7:18-20 (NKJV) For I know that in me (that is, in my flesh) nothing
good dwells; for to will is present with me, but how to perform what is good I do not find. For the good that I
will to do, I do not do; but
the evil I will not to do, that
I practice. Now if I do what I will not to
do, it is no longer I who do it, but sin that dwells in me.
How
can we improve our integrity? Here are
four practical things that we can do:
1. Speak Honestly. Mark Twain said one time that speaking honestly
is better in our lives, it takes a lot of stress out of our lives. He said "If you tell the truth, you
don't have to remember anything."
As you speak honestly let's do it in the way the Bible says to do
it. Eph. 4:15 "Speak the truth in a spirit of love".
Some people speak the truth in a relationship
in a way that destroys the relationship rather than building the relationship. Some people don't tell the truth they launch the
truth -- a guided missile into your life.
Sort of Clint Eastwood kind of truth tellers, they pull it out like a 44
Magnum and blow you away with it then they walk away feeling great about
themselves and you're laying on the floor destroyed. "I told the truth" they say, but
not the truth in the spirit of love.
2. Confess
Regularly. We do this when we admit that
we are wrong. When you're wrong admit
it. Admit it to the people you're in
relationship with. James talks about
doing that. James 5:16 "Admit your faults to one another and pray
for each other." Isn't telling
our faults to God enough? Do we have to
ask for other's permission to be forgiven too? No, because God is the one who forgives us. But in order to restore our
relationship with them, we need to talk to them about what happened.
This
involves a principle in forgiveness that's called restitution. Usually the first thing you think of is
financial restitution. If I've taken
money or possessions from them and I recognize that I've been wrong, then I
need to go back and not only ask for God's forgiveness but I also need to give
back what was taken. You don't get to
keep the money. Relational restitutions works the same way. You need to do your best at giving back to
the person what you have taken. If you
were harsh; you need to give them kindness.
If it was anger; you need to return love. You can only do this through time and
conversation.
3. Live Consistently. The
opposite of consistency is hypocrisy.
You may be able to hide hypocrisy at work or church but you can't hide
it at home where people know you. Living
consistently is vital in our public image as compared to our private
image. How important really is your
relationship with those people in your private life? Who do you really want to be admired by at
the end of life? Our goals should be to
be admired the most by those who are closest to us - who know us best.
Secondly,
consistency is vital in discipline and values. Have you ever had dealings with
a yo-yo.... type of person? Today they
say this and tomorrow they say something completely different. A lot of politicians fall into this
category. Their values are determined by
the weather or the latest Gallop poll.
They are inconsistent with what they believe. To either live or work with someone who
changes their mind like the wind.... becomes an effort in futility! In
parenting, to be consistent is a difficult thing. But if you are, then your children will have
stability. A parent or a boss who
behaves inconsistently only creates chaos in the lives of others!
Thirdly, consistency is vital
between our words and actions. Words are not what's important. Words are not what's going to impact
people. Our actions and the way we
behave is what changes people's
lives. More is caught than it is taught!
I
Samuel 16:7 "Man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at
the heart."
That's what those who are closest to us see too. Our heart, who we really are. That's what impacts them and influences them.
So how is your life exemplifying integrity?
Read: Psalm 19:7-14 & Romans 7:14-20
